Dear Mel,
I’ve been with my current company for a few months now, and overall, I’m enjoying the work. However, there’s one issue that’s been bothering me: some of my colleagues make me feel incompetent or inferior.
It’s frustrating because I feel like my ideas are often dismissed, and my contributions seem to be undervalued. Whenever I suggest something, they act like my ideas aren't relevant or connected to the work we do. It’s starting to make me second-guess myself, and I’m not sure how to handle this situation moving forward.
Sincerly,
I have a Voice Too
Dear "I Have a Voice Too,
Thank you for sharing what you’re going through. It sounds like a tough situation, but I’m really glad you’re speaking up about it because feeling dismissed at work can be disheartening, especially when you’re still settling into a new role. I want to encourage you that your voice and ideas do matter, even if some of your colleagues haven’t recognized that yet.
Here are a few thoughts that might help you navigate this:
Start with Confidence in Your Ideas
First, trust that your ideas have value. You were hired for a reason, and your unique perspective is part of what you bring to the team. Don’t let the dismissiveness of others shake your belief in what you have to offer. Sometimes, new voices challenge the status quo, and that’s not always well-received right away, but it doesn’t mean your ideas are wrong.
Seek Constructive Feedback
If your colleagues think your ideas aren’t relevant, try asking for specifics about why they feel that way. Approach it from a learning perspective: “I’d love to better understand how my suggestion doesn’t align with what we’re doing. Could you help me see the gaps so I can improve for next time?” This shows you're open to growth, but it also makes them explain their reasoning, which might reveal whether they’re truly dismissing your ideas for valid reasons or just being dismissive.
Look for Allies
There might be someone on your team who’s more open-minded or appreciates your insights. If you can find one colleague to support you or listen to your ideas before you present them to the group, it might give you a boost of confidence. It can also create more of a united front when sharing ideas in meetings.
Don’t Let It Stop You from Contributing
It’s tempting to go quiet when your ideas are brushed aside, but I encourage you not to stop contributing. The more you share, the more you’ll learn how to tailor your ideas to fit the company’s needs while still bringing fresh insights. You may not win them over right away, but persistence will help you refine your approach and make your voice heard.
Consider a Direct Conversation
If you feel comfortable, it might help to have a one-on-one conversation with one of your colleagues or a supervisor about how you’ve been feeling. Frame it in terms of your desire to contribute more effectively: “I’ve noticed that my ideas don’t seem to land well in discussions, and I’d love to hear your perspective on how I can align my input better with the team’s goals.” This can open the door to a more productive conversation without making anyone defensive.
Ultimately, it’s important that you don’t let this experience undermine your self-worth. You’re still new, and sometimes it takes time to fully integrate into a team dynamic. Keep speaking up, refining your approach, and staying true to your voice.
You’ve got this!
Warmly,
Mel